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Showing posts from April, 2005

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Heavy meta: Why am I So Single? @sosinglemusical

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Being young and single never seemed so fun, full of energy, yet full of contradictions in this high-concept meta-musical, Why Am I So Single? The fourth wall is not so much broken as endlessly pummelled as the cast talks directly to the audience. Frequently. But essentially, it’s about young people with neuroses and smartphone addiction exploring why they can’t find love in present-day London. Told with a series of spectacular songs and dance scenes in this new musical from the creators of Six, Toby Marlow and Lucy Moss. But while we don’t necessarily get an answer that rings true to the question posed by this show, you are likely to be distracted mainly by the energy and the songs. It’s currently playing at the Garrick Theatre.  A new musical based on an original idea, the premise is that Oliver (Jo Foster) and Nancy (Leesa Tulley) - which are not their real names but names taken from their favourite musical, Oliver - have to write a new musical but are stuck for an idea. So, after e
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Scenes from Charing Cross Tube (Northern Line) 23:30... L'amour est dans le ciel... 
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Scenes from London Bridge 23:00 - Caught up with drinks with B tonight and made my way home a little bit tipsy - but still managing to capture the banal... 
News: swim for your life This week Hampstead bathers win court case establishing their right to swim in freezing ponds - without a lifeguard - if they wish to do so. Bathers and their supporters hailed it as a victory against the Nanny State (which is very important here, unlike in Australia where people love the government to tell people what they should and shouldn't be doing). The case was seen as a test case against endless regulation and fear of litigation. The judgement paves the way for members or the swimming club to swim at the ponds without life guards on duty - and also protects the Corporation of London from being sued should anything go wrong. That sounds awfully sensible.
Rats A rat went scurrying past me in the kitchen last night. He seemed to be in a bit of a hurry. This news seemed to be just as shocking to my flatmate as the news that I should vote Tory. I suggested that warfarin would solve the rat problem, but that Tory voters are bound to flourish as Labour continues to stay in office. At the National Theatre tonight a rat ran out from under one food counter and hid under the table near me. It then ran back. A few of us watched this rat run with bemusement. Have made mental note to just use the bar at intermission in future. They do seem to be getting closer ...
Theatre: History Boys. Pass it on... Finally caught The History Boys at the National. It was closing night of its extended run and it was another astonishing piece of theatre. As theatre goes, this has to be as good as it can get. At the conclusion, the audience gave a standing ovation to the cast and playwright Alan Bennett . The play is described as "an unruly bunch of bright, funny sixth-form boys in pursuit of sex, sport and a place at university". But there is so much more going on here. Broader issues of Education are explored as just the starting point. This is a play that is full of witty barbs and sharp dialogue that surely will have a place in future dictionaries of quotations. A particular favourite of mine in the second act... Mrs Lintott (a teacher): Our Headmaster is a twat. An impermissible word nowadays but the only one suited to my purpose. A twat. And to go further down the same proscribed path, a condescending cunt. At a point later in the second act th
An open letter to Mother I had a quiet weekend (not counting getting home at 3am on Saturday and Sunday morning) so I used the time to catch up on some letters from home. Since my mother is probably the only person that reads this I thought I would answers some questions from her recent letters: I don't know anybody that collects stamps. I try not to use the word philately in conversation in case it is misunderstood... Don't let Dad leave you outside the men's toilets. It isn't a good look. I did hear about the baggage handler who had a camel's head. It is nice to hear that QANTAS employs all sorts... When seeing London in only one day, Do breakfast in Soho not Piccadilly, go to the Tate not Saatchi Gallery, and see a £10 play at the National or use the TKTS booth . So there you have it.
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Scenes from Selfridges Oxford Street Sunday 19:38 
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Tory boy and didn't even know it... I found out from the following website that I should vote Tory if I did bother to register to vote. Actually on my first attempt it suggested because I had such non-committal responses to all their questions I should vote for nobody - so I am doing the right thing by staying out of this one. Only after I decided on the questionnaire to keep Britain out of the Euro and to believe in tax cuts and ID cards did the site suggest I should vote Conservative. Labour came second. Interesting stuff, although it does not factor in the character of candidates and the type of person you would be more inclined to vote for... Policy, pledges and platforms (for whatever that rubbish is) surely can only get you so far... Personality of the leader will always clinch it for me... The other thing is that I don't know how I am going to break this to my housemate who did the test and was told he should vote Green... He will be horrified. It was his birthday the ot
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Scenes from Kensington Park Sunday 19:18.  
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Scenes from High Holburn 14:59 - Boys on the street 
Rubbing it in... At after-work drinks last night, J mentioned he was going to his partner's place and was looking forward to a night in. Massage was mentioned as part of the night in. I commented that it had been some time since I had that... The massage, not the night in... So J told my mission for the evening was to get a massage - without having to pay for it (as that would be too easy)... Today I texted J: Mission Accomplished London is like that... When it works, it works very well...
News: Flounders and Flowers Variety called it "Les Miz lite" and others have been even less unkind. So much so that The Independent suggests there is a curse of the Shaftesbury theatre... Or at least a curse of crap productions playing in it... Oh and Kew Gardens has a big, smelly flower And lock your doors, Violent crime in London is up , although crime overall is down. Part of the increase in certain stats is that they are now being recorded. For instance, sexual offences are up, as indecent exposure now is a criminal offence and is recorded. Fascinating stats are available across all of London to enthrall.
News: The Sun endorses Labour The Sun Newspaper - not to be outdone by the conclave in Italy - set up its own chimney and set off a puff of smoke today in London. The smoke was red indicating it will support Labour for its third term. Oh and the front page today read "From Hitler Youth to Papa Razi"... Boom boom!
Post France The weekend trip has had a positive impact on me. I have been drinking more French red... It helps with the cold I still have... I have been enthralling colleagues with photos from France. Plus since returning I have downloaded some music off iTunes by Dalida . Quand on voulait la danser Il suffisait de marcher Le lambeth walk C'était pas compliqué He ! So I now have the French version of "The Lambeth Walk"... And I never did have enough eighties French pop in my collection...
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Scenes from the National Theatre 19:18 - Book signing with Julian Clary . After a talk tonight that I attended I picked up a copy of the book as well... and got Julian to sign it... Up close he doesn't look half bad. However his good hair stylist and tailoring made one feel downright shabby so avoided any conversation...
Bad news... Hearing about the death of a friend today has put blogging a little on hold... But coming home on the tube tonight I did listen to a song by William Finn which contains some great lyrics: I believe, And I have found, Hyperbole, is not what makes the world go round, Just living, just navigating firm and level ground, Has power to astound, I have found. It's been said, And I have heard, That quiet, doesn't have to be a dirty word, Just talking,is often more expressive than a shriek, Its nice to merely speak, I have found. Look around Contentment it seems, Simply happens It appears Accompanied by no grovels And no tears from "I have found" - William Finn And so life goes on...
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Scenes from outside Angers Sunday afternoon: Complete with National Front posters urging a no vote in the upcoming referendum on the EU constitution... 

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Paul's Travelling Tips Miscellany More on my weekend later but first my observations travelling 300kph out of Paris: A trip to Paris, then on to Angers need not be tiring... Just travel first class. My return leg was in a solo seat so I did not have to play footsie with anybody... The seats are bigger and the cars are quieter... And in general the cars have much better looking people in them... Although the only attractive people in my car tonight are the women... You also get nicer messages on the PA system, and the crew are much more polite. Unless of course you are Grace Jones trying to get a free upgrade, or the Asian woman at Gare Du Nord who showed her ticket to the smart French gent after me and got: "YOU ARE CAR THREE THIS IS CAR TWELVE! MOVE ALONG!" I am typing this while having a nice glass of champagne. There is a bottle of Bordeaux waiting after that as well... The 3pm train out of Waterloo is a good one to catch if you wish to pick up a Gaelic Businessman ret

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Travelling Travelling on the Eurostar speeding through the French countryside, one notices how much smarter it is to travel in first class. However one can sympathise with Grace Jones as the leg room is still a bit minimal. Have been playing footsies with the French businessman sitting opposite me for most of the journey. Oh and there is an over representation of laptops in the car I am travelling in - hence getting out the iPAQ to be a poser as well...
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Scenes from the Barbican Thursday 22:03. Intermission 
Theatre: Alas thou has misconstrued everything... Julius Caesar Julius Caesar last night at the Barbican was a marathon effort. First half ran for two hours, then half an hour intermission, followed by another hour. F thought there were a few places they could have cut, but with things falling onto stage, loud explosions, huge crowd scenes, and an updating of the production to a Bush-like era, there was plenty to take in. Sitting in second row, Ralph Feinnes as Marc Antony was particularly engaging. Of course he could read the back of a cereal packet and have had the audience hanging on to every word. But the rest of the cast was just as good. Being a preview there were a few little odd bits, such as a very bright torch falling on stage and pointing out to the audience. The effect was that half the audience in the stalls had to squint for five minutes until an actor picked it up. Given the star power of the cast, it seems like it will be a popular blockbuster production. Whether ever
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Scenes from Charing Cross Road 20:24 - Outside Foyles bookstore 
News: Freud's latest Lucian Freud new self-portrait goes on show at the National Portrait Gallery. The speculation over who the young naked woman clinging to the 82 year old painter is commences... Nothing like a bit of mystery in the art world, particularly involving a superstar artist... Alas the gallery was not open when I walked by it tonight... Some other time News: Sock it to him Cherie Blair last night tells the East End constituency of New Labour MP Oona King to give George Galloway a bloodied nose at the ballot box. George Galloway used to be a Scottish Labour MP who was famous for visiting and brown nosing Saddam in Iraq. Now with his own loony left / broad coalition of anyone against the war party, he is hoping to capture the Muslim vote in the east end. The papers tried to pin many things on Galloway but he won libel suits against them, but there is something unpleasant about this beady-eyed bald Scotsman. Still that has never stopped anyone from getting elected... N
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Scenes from Tottenham Court Road 21:26 
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Scenes from the Central Line Monday 21:24 - Between Holburn and Tottenham Court Road 
News: Is this the way to Amarillo Tony Christie's ditty has been four weeks at No 1 . It is a catchy tune, and has a very tacky video clip which may explain the enduring appeal. Even guys working out at the gym will stop to look at the TV screens when it starts playing... Hmmm...
New Look... new products Today was told my skin looked fabulous. I explained could have been the result of: Several litres of water (with gas) I have consumed in the past 24 hours Some anti-aging face mask I had a sample of and applied overnight Sauna at the gym at Bayswater from Sunday Bronzing anti-shine face powder (just the thing for polluted London streets) All of the above Much later, after a 20 minute jog at the gym, one did not look as great. Yet to master the look cool in the gym. Just look sweaty instead.
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Scenes from Bayswater tube Sunday 18:41.  
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Scenes from Goodge St Tube Saturday 22:22 
News: Misc 'Rubbish' art offered to visitors at the Serpentine today as Takahashi's installation is offered to the public ... Wearing an Abercrombie & Fitch t-shirt ordered online this week which has on it "Here's to being single". A&F are quite popular here amongst the gay punters with their modern takes on classic clean cut items. Late last year they settled a class action discrimination case which accused the company of being a little too clean cut and a little too all-white. Of course none of this stops the punters buying the goods...
Overheard on the Tube tonight: Chav #1: I am not doin' any more girls until school finishes... Chav #2: Yeah? Chav #1: But Jo came yesterday at 5 and I gave her a good shaggin'... She won't forget that... Overheard at the London Lesbian and Gay Film Fest tonight: Leather Man #1: You know Peter, the young boy that hangs around us sometimes? Leather Man #2: Oh yes I know the one Leather Man #1: Well he sent me a text around lunchtime which said, "Get yourself to a TV, she looks faaabulous in oyster silk and chiffon!"
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Scenes from outside National Film Theatre (under Waterloo Bridge) 15:30 - crowded both inside and out with punters seeing the London Lesbian & Gay Film Fest  
Theatre: Too much of everything for a chilly night in London... Saw The Far Pavilions tonight. It is a new musical based on the novel by M.M. Kaye, and was previously a BBC mini-series. Obviously musical was the next logical step. Hmmm... Unfortunately epic stories don't usually make for great musicals. For every Les Miserables there is Gone with the Wind or Shogun . This show seems to fall into the latter category. Set in India it is a convoluted tale about love, the Raj and lots of other things. Being an epic melodrama, the story did get in the way of everything. It also didn't help that the music is not very good (a problem since it is mostly through-sung), the cast had difficulty with the music, and the stage kept spinning around. The spinning stage was a curious staging choice that had the effect of making most people in the front rows a little giddy from its overuse. On the plus side however I thought the staging and some of the songs were quite good. And given that Bo
Music: All Beethoven and no bite Caught the LSO Beethoven Concert tonight . It was a sensational programme of the Coriolan Overture, Symphony No 6 (‘Pastoral’), and then Symphony No 7. All are very listenable and perfect for unwinding at the end of the day, and the sound that conductor Sir John Eliot Gardiner got from the orchestra was exquisite. Hearing the orchestra at times barely above pianissamo was something else. Quite appropriate to play the Pastoral symphony today as storms break out over Britain, and temperatures are expected to dive below freezing tonight. Also, during interval I did notice how cruisy the foyers were... I didn't get approached but I did some heavy duty checking out - complete double takes, distracting people from their conversation and the like (and no I didn't have something on my tie - I did check). It was great for the ego. I could feel it inflate as I drank my Becks. Alas there was no follow up as the bells went to go back in to the co
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Scenes from Liverpool St Station 18:48 - Rush hour... 
News: Its all over for Rover (well it will be) Big news tonight is that the Government announces that receivers are called in by MG Rover , and the company disputes this. The announcement came after the Chinese back out of a deal to take over the company. Production stopped today in the West Midlands plant and the future of the company doesn't look bright. Apart from making rubbish cars that fill up London streets by people with no taste, it appears the company hasn't really made it ever since BMW walked away from it five years ago... Unfortunately 20,000 jobs are likely to disappear in a matter of days...
News: Strange, I've seen that upgrade before... Grace Jones gets thrown off the Eurostar in Kent for being a bitch, which is why people love her anyway (although not Eurostar staff now I suspect). Actually when I saw her on the front page of tonight's Evening Standard I thought "oh no, she's dead!". But no, she was just causing a ruckus after sitting in Premium Class when she only had a First Class ticket, and then beating up some poor unsuspecting Eurostar inspector. Maybe it was the warm leatherette that appealed to her so much she didn't want to move. I am traveling first class next weekend to Angers, but I don't think I will be a slave to the Premium class, I will sit where my seat allocation tells me to...
Drinks, what drinks? Have managed to go to the gym four days in a row. Doing different parts of the body of course, but this sudden burst of physical activity was more by accident than design. For the last two nights people have cancelled drinks on me. Having a hunch that this was possible as both nights the drinks would have been with ambivalent types, I took my gym bag as plan B. So while I haven't been social, I have been getting fitter. I pointed out to my single colleagues at work that this is important in the post breakup period as by the time one has got one's shit together, one will look a bitofallright. Because let's face it, when you are in a relationship... Things can get let go... Even when they shouldn't. Overheard at the gym tonight: Nothing... All was quiet (during the times I wasn't plugged into the iPOD listening to Kylie's latest single Giving You Up - her 29th top 10 UK single - downloaded from iTunes) But overheard on Tottenham Court Road: G
News: No more Jinxes The Sun did its bit to help the royal marriage get over the recent series of mishaps by sending a Druid to Windsor Castle to bless some lookalike couples and waving a "curse-be-gone" stick. That'll do it... The Druid appears to have a fake Santa Claus beard and is wearing an outfit with the logo of the paper in clear view...
Overheard in gym tonight: Muscle Mary (on mobile): I don't mind going to a straight bar, I am sick of the gay onesssssssssssss.
News: a most predictable week Pope dies and is buried Friday. On Monday morning there was much alarm at the thought that flags on buildings would be flying at half mast on the day the heir to the throne would be married. The fact that they are flying at half mast on various buildings is something to pause about in Protestant Britain. But the problem disappeared once the decision to change the wedding to Saturday so the Prince could attend the funeral. How in 500 years things change. The Guardian is calling it the slow death of Protestant England . Protestants can take heart that at least the future King is marrying a divorcee, and if the Daily Mirror is to be believed, he was furious that he had to change the date to Saturday . The front page had the classic headline: NO WEDDING AND A FUNERAL. Oh and given the wedding is now on Saturday, it will clash with the Grand National, and so after some horse trading, the race will be delayed by 25 minutes to enable the BBC to cover both ...
Latest weather reports... Managed to find my stash of Australian Kangaroo Pins given to me before I left by a friend in Oz. The idea being to wear them while you are out and about and if you hit it off with somebody who is abitofallright then you give them the pin. Well hey, you gotta have a gimmick... Will try it out over the next few days...
News: There goes the tea towells It was announced late this morning that the Pope's funeral was to be Friday, then an hour later Clarence House announced Charles and Camilla would now get married on Saturday. In the meantime, punters raced out to buy all the tat they could grab with the wrong date on it . I guess the thought is that one day it would be valuable, but cheap printed tea towells are hardly going to a collectors item.
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Scenes from Trafalgar Square 19:00. Chewing gum and pigeon bits 
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Scenes from Covent Garden 18:16. There was an unusually large number of people watching this act. This appeared due to the fact the performer wearing a thong and with a large bulge down his front. Here he was mounting an unsuspecting man from the audience... Not much was left to the immagination here...and the punters couldn't get enough of it... Saucy bunch of tourists... 
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Scenes from Bloomsbury Sunday 14:19. Spring is in the air. Leaves are starting to reappear, and the joggers now wear short shorts rather than track pants... 
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Scenes from Milton Keynes 6:50pm. I went to Milton Keynes tonight to see the UK tour version of Thoroughly Modern Millie , which was great. The show didn't last long enough in London for me to get around to seeing it last year, and I always have wondered what Milton Keynes was like. Now that I have seen it, I don't have to ever die wondering what this place is like. It has a well-deserved crap town status .  
Art isn't easy: Caravaggio I had pre-booked tickets to see at the National Gallery Caravaggio: The Final Years , which everyone has been raving about, and it was worth it. Some amazing pieces of the artists work made in his final years together in the same location was quite impressive. Those that recommended the exhibition to me I suspect were devotees of the Derek Jarman film from the eighties which certainly focused on the homoerotic nature of his works (and the artists impulses in that direction)... The exhibition suggests his life was a little more complex than a raving queen who got into fights and killed a man, but it all made for interesting context when looking at the art. Actually amongst the hoards of people at the exhibition there were quite a few friends of Dorothy lurking amongst the darkened rooms and I thought it was if the curators were trying to add some of the seediness of the life the artist led to the exhibition. In fact the darkness was to bring out the artwo
Weather resolution Guy-who-took-room-after-me ends up suggesting on Friday night we go for a drink, which after leaving work at 8pm I figure what the hell, I'll skip gym for that. However: He has another commitment so drinks will commence at 10.30pm, which is hardly enough time before closing to make it worth the effort, but I figure I am only a 20 minute walk to soho so I should be arsed to do that. I spend the hour and a bit between getting home and going out again discussing the imminent Papal death with lapsed Catholics back in Australia. After quick drink in soho Guy-who-took-room-after-me suggests we head to G-A-Y at the Astoria . He bought with him fliers to get cheap (and quick) entry which I thought was pretty organised. The only thing to wait for was the security check. Security guard frisks me and queries the five pound note I have scrunched up in my jeans pocket. I say to him, "its money" and I guess that dumb response suggested I was not some coke ad
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Scenes from Stockwell Tube, Friday 9.16am: Waiting for the service to resume after it was suspended... 
Weather Changes 3 At the gym tonight I get a text message from guy-who-took-room-after-me who suggests we should catch up again for a drink. Naturally I text everyone who I had mentioned this unfolding little story, but neglect to text guy-who-took-room-after-me back. Seek to resolve this by phoning but get voicemail instead. Let the phone tag commence... Overhead at gym tonight Muscle Mary 1: I was married once. Two years. No kids thankfully. Muscle Mary 2: I have always wondered what it would be like to do... You know... A woman...
News: Bloody, bloody people The heir to the throne was caught on microphone saying how awful the bloody (royal) press are ... Well what do you expect from the journalists where a scoop constitutes who Prince William has been taking to the slopes ?? And over 9 million people tuned in to see it, but Christopher Eccleston won't return for a second series of Dr Who . After finally watching it the other night, it was actually pretty darn good. London looked great in the first episode of the new series where mannequins and wheelie bins wreck havoc over the city.